April Newsletter

I Can Life Coaching April Newsletter

I Can Life Coaching - April Newsletter ♫ ♫ I'm dreaming of a white Easter! ♫ ♫ Well, we did have a few flakes over Easter and the coldest March for 50 years too which is unbelievable particularly as my last newsletter was looking forward to the beginning of Spring! It's a shame we've had such a cold snap when so many of us were looking forward to beautiful, warm, springy days, so I thought I would base this newsletter on what happens when things don't go according to plan! Hope you had a great Easter weekend, by the way! "Well you can either laugh or cry" I've heard many times and it is so true! Quite often we can feel like crying when things go wrong but sometimes, we choose to laugh instead - as it's often so ridiculous! The truth of the matter is it's all down to our choice as to what we decide to do.  And for most of the time, I'd certainly choose to laugh where I can rather than cry - although there are times, when a good old cry can certainly release a lot of built up tension! But the trick, I think is not to let that happen too often. If it's happening too often it's a sign that things are out of balance somewhere and could do with addressing! My favourite equation is O=E+R.  I try to use it as often as I can and the more often I use it, the more natural it becomes. It stands for Outcome equals Event plus Reaction. Imagine you are late for an important event and you are on the motorway when you get stuck in traffic. What do you do? Do you scream and shout at the cars in front, moan about the roadworks, shout at other passengers in the car maybe or do you stop and think "There's nothing I can do about this, so I will stick on my favourite music and make the most of this extra time?" What is the Outcome you want? Do you want to be stressed or would you rather turn up relaxed to this event? Whatever Outcome you want, can help you decide what your Reaction could be to this Event! It's really worth taking some time to think about this; as often we can choose the wrong Reaction which generally has a snowball effect on the rest of the day too. Have you ever had days when everything seems to go wrong? This can often put us in a bad mood and others react to us accordingly.  If we choose to be more positive, it can have a massive impact on our day and the way other people react to us too.  Feel free to try it out and see for yourself! I'd love to hear how you get on, please feel free to email me and let me know your stories on how it's worked for you! Giving up Life can often be so simple really! Do you know why most people don't stick to their New Year's Resolutions or Goals? Well, it's simply because they give up! The trick is to accept that there will be obstacles and challenges along the way but when they happen, stop, assess what's happened and work out ways to continue moving forward. Think of your goal as the top of a mountain. To get to the top, you need to take one step at a time. When you get to the top, it's a result of all those little steps you took! You didn't give up and turn back around! Sometimes your limiting beliefs get in the way or you may set goals which aren't congruent with your values.  Life Coaches can help you gain clarity on what gets in the way and they will also help you set goals in line with your values. Connecting: If you would like to find out more about Life Coaching or if you would like to connect with me via social media, please click on the relevant links below: Email: info@icanlifecoaching.co.uk View my website: www.icanlifecoaching.co.uk Follow my Facebook Page: ICanLifeCoaching Join me on Twitter: @icanlifecoachin Connect with me on LinkedIn: Nicolina Zarola Read my blog: icanlifecoaching.blogspot.co.uk Follow me on Pinterest: icanlifecoachin

The Serenity Prayer - God grant me the serenity to accept the things I can not change... courage to change the things I can... and wisdom to know the difference - Reinhold Niebuhr Famous people who have overcome challenges! Albert Einstein couldn't speak until he was almost 4 and teachers said he wouldn't amount to much. Walt Disney was fired for lacking imagination and his Theme Park concept was rejected 302 times. The Beatles were told they had no future in show business. J K Rowling was turned down by multiple publishers. Helen Keller was deaf and blind and successfully promoted women's rights. Winston Churchill overcame stuttering and poor perfomance at school. Thomas Edison (even though he wasn't the inventor of the lightbulb), produced the first commercially viable one and is famous for saying he didn't fail, he just found 10,000 ways which didn't work! Henry Ford went broke 5 times before succeeding. Howard Schultz (Starbucks) was turned down by banks 242 times. Stephen Spielberg was rejected from Film School 3 times. Stephen King received 30 rejections before becoming a successful author. Steve Jobs was fired from Apple in 1985 (the company he had created)! Michael Jordan was cut from his High School basketball team. The list could go on and on! There are many things which can get in the way but believing in yourself, persistence, resilience & determination are top common traits for people who overcome challenges. Sharing is caring! If you like this newsletter and feel others would like it too, please feel free to share it by clicking on the links below. They can then choose to subscribe using the link at the bottom if they wish! Like Tweet Forward to Friend +1 Share If a friend has forwarded this email onto you and you would like to subscribe to this monthly newsletter, please click here and press send

Copyright © 2013 I Can Life Coaching, All rights reserved. unsubscribe from this list    update subscription preferences

March Newsletter

I Can Life Coaching - March Newsletter Spring is on it's way! Isn't it great that March is here and we know that Spring is on it's way. It can often be a time of spring cleaning and de-cluttering and can be a great time to spring clean and de-clutter our minds too! We may have set New Year's Resolutions and may be flying through them or we may need to take time to review them or even start them up again. What better time to do that than Spring when we are awakening and feeling more vibrant! How often do you take time out to review your life? What's going well and what needs tweaking. There's a great Life Coaching Tool called the Wheel of Life which enables you to look at important areas in your life and review them to see how satisfied you are in these areas and what you need to do to improve them. I have recently created a workbook which can help you create your own Personal Life Plan. It gives you the opportunity to use the Wheel of Life to help take stock of your life and work out what steps you need to do to ensure you are living a full and happy life! If you'd like a copy of this 'Free' Workbook, please click on the grey box below and I will email it to you. The workbook will help you create vision and give you tips on the best ways to set resolutions (or goals) in a way that you are able to stick to them. Even if you are completely happy with your life as it is now, it is still useful to be able to look and review it to help you keep moving forward! Please send me my free Create your own Personal Life Plan workbook Spring Cleaning your belief system. A belief is something that we accept as true even though it might not necessarily be true. Often we can believe things about ourselves which hold us back as we look for evidence to prove it as true. Our beliefs can often start in childhood and can be reinforced by parents, friends, teachers, work colleagues and other people we come into contact with. The trouble is beliefs can become a self-fulfilling prophecy. For example a child can trip up and a parent can quite innocently say "You are so clumsy". Brothers or Sisters may pick up on this too and again, innocently say "You are so clumsy". This could then be reinforced by friends and other people - again all quite innocently but the problem begins when we start believing this about ourself and then start to act that way too. Take a moment to stop and ask yourself what beliefs you have about yourself that are holding you back. One of the most common beliefs is "I'm not good enough". Spring clean this belief by reframing it to the opposite "I am good enough". Keep reinforcing it until it  becomes  a self-fulfilling prophecy!  Change your limiting beliefs to empowering beliefs! Connecting: If you would like to find out more about Life Coaching or if you would like to connect with me, please click on the following links: Email: info@icanlifecoaching.co.uk View my website: www.icanlifecoaching.co.uk Follow my Facebook Page: ICanLifeCoaching Join me on Twitter: @icanlifecoachin Connect with me on LinkedIn: Nicolina Zarola Read my blog: icanlifecoaching.blogspot.co.uk Follow me on Pinterest: icanlifecoachin If a friend has forwarded this email onto you and you would like to subscribe to this monthly newsletter, please click here and press send Hope you have a Springing March! Nicolina Zarola When you change the way you look at things, the way you look at things change. The Cookie Thief Poem by Valerie Cox A woman was waiting at an airport one night, with several long hours before her flight. She hunted for a book in the airport shops. Bought a bag of cookies and found a place to drop. She was engrossed in her book but happened to see, that the man sitting beside her, as bold as could be, grabbed a cookie or two from the bag in between, which she tried to ignore to avoid a scene.   So she munched the cookies and watched the clock, as the gutsy cookie thief diminished her stock. She was getting more irritated as the minutes ticked by, thinking, “If I wasn’t so nice, I would blacken his eye.”   With each cookie she took, he took one too. When only one was left, she wondered what he would do. With a smile on his face, and a nervous laugh, he took the last cookie and broke it in half. He offered her half, as he ate the other. She snatched it from him and thought… oooh brother. This guy has some nerve and he’s also rude. Why he didn’t even show any gratitude! She had never known when she had been so galled, and sighed with relief when her flight was called.   She gathered her belongings and headed to the gate, refusing to look back at the thieving ingrate. She boarded the plane, and sank in her seat. Then she sought her book, which was almost complete. As she reached in her baggage, she gasped with surprise. There was her bag of cookies, in front of her eyes. If mine are here, she moaned in despair, the others were his, and he tried to share. Too late to apologise, she realised with grief, that she was the rude one, the ingrate, the thief! Sharing: If you like this newsletter and feel others may benefit, please feel free to share by clicking on the links below: Like Tweet Forward to Friend +1 Share

Copyright © 2013 I Can Life Coaching, All rights reserved. I hope you enjoyed this newsletter and I hope you enjoy future newsletters too. I always welcome feedback - so please let me know of any ways you think I could improve this newsletter. If it's not your thing, please feel free to unsubscribe at any time by clicking on the link below or if you wish to remain subscribed but at a different email address, please feel free to amend your details in the subscription preferences below. To make sure you don't miss out on future newsletters, please add me to your address book! I treat your privacy seriously and will never pass on your details to a third party. Our mailing address is: I Can Life Coaching 20 Birch Drive Bradwell Village, Oxfordshire OX18 4XH United Kingdom Add us to your address book unsubscribe from this list    update subscription preferences

February Newsletter

Thought I'd share my February Newsletter with you. Please click on this link to view!
http://eepurl.com/uCLWf

What's the Number 1 secret to keeping your New Year's Resolution?

This may sound obvious but the number 1 secret to keeping your New Year's Resolution is to Never Give Up!  Keep reading and all will be revealed!

Why is it that we have a bad week and things don't go to plan so we end up saying something like: "That's it. I can't do this. I'm giving up. It's not for me" etc and then we try to justify why it isn't for us.  I've done it and you've probably done it.  When losing weight, I've relapsed so thought "Well, I might as well have that Pizza and that Ice-cream and that massive bit of cake then" and give up totally and then justify it by saying "Well, life is for living. If you can't enjoy your food, then what's the point?!"

That is the point. Life is for living - which is why we don't want a 'permanently' bad diet. It's all about balance. 

Hopefully, you're keeping your New Year's Resolution but the Media tell us that most of us give up within the first month or even in February (for the stronger willed!) So we listen to them and believe that the same will happen to us.  Don't listen to them!! You're telling your subconscious mind that it won't work. Instead tell your subconscious mind that it will work for you. 

It's important to focus on your resolution and know where you want to go. Think of your subconscious mind as your Taxi Driver. If you tell him exactly where you want to go, he will take you straight there but if you tell him you're not sure, how will he know where to go (or she, if it's a female Taxi Driver!) The people who succeed are the ones who keep going. If J K Rowling stopped after being turned down by multiple publishers, we wouldn't have heard of Harry Potter. The Walt Disney Theme Park concept was turned down 302 times, but they kept going!

So what do you do if you've given up - how do you get back on track?
Learn from your past.  Ask yourself why you gave up. What happened? Was your resolution too challenging or too boring maybe? What do you need to do differently this time to get back on track again.  Keep going and every time an obstacle arises, do the same thing again.  Learn from it and adjust.

"If you always do what you've always done, you'll always get what you've always got"

Believe in yourself. You can do it!

I hope this article has inspired you to keep up your New Year's Resolution or to get back on track with it.  For more tips on keeping them, see my previous blog.  Sharing your New Year's Resolution with someone else is always a good thing to do to help keep you on track. So talk to a good friend about it or feel free to contact me, as a Life Coach, I would love to help.

If you liked this article, please share it with others by clicking on the links below.

I would love to hear your stories about your New Year's Resolutions. What do you do to keep on track? OR what challenges have you found? Please comment below ...

8 Tips to help you keep your New Year's Resolutions

Over the last week, I've been adding some mini daily tips on keeping New Year's Resolutions to my 'I Can Life Coaching' page on Facebook.  So I thought I would consolidate them on my blog to share. I hope you find them helpful.

"Begin with the end in mind" Stephen Covey

Tip 1. Be specific. What exactly is it that you want? Visualise it. Close your eyes and dream you've already achieved it. What do you see? Really feel the emotions you will feel when you have it. What do you hear? What are people saying to you? Try to use all your senses in this visualisation and take as long as you need dreaming and imagining you already have it. Really play with it. How good does it feel? To take this further, why not make a vision board by cutting out pictures from magazines so you have something to remind you daily.

Keep learning and adjusting

Tip 2.  Don't give up when you fall at the first hurdle!! Or possibly more hurdles! Many of us give up on our New Year's Resolutions when we are unable to keep them up. Keep going even when things get in the way. Learn from what's got in your way and work out ways to overcome it. Remember to climb a mountain, you need to take one step at a time! A lot of New Year's Resolutions revolve around setting new habits, be easy on yourself and allow yourself time to adjust! Good luck and keep going! Remember the famous Thomas Edison quote: "I have not failed, I have just found 10,000 ways which didn't work". Most successful people become successful by overcoming obstacles and not giving up. Learn from the past and keep moving forward. You will get there.

Tip 3. Give yourself a deadline. I know this may sound like pressure to some and sometimes you don't know how long something will take but give yourself a date as it helps keep you focused. Your subconscious mind will be able to help you if you have a date (otherwise you can do it next week/month/year instead)! Have you noticed if you want to lose weight for a wedding or holiday or if you have an event to train for etc, this helps give you something to aim for. Remember to make it as realistic as you can. And if the worst comes to the worst and you're unable to make that deadline, then all you have to do is change it! But it definitely helps to keep you focused if you have something to aim for. To make it more exciting, plan a treat for yourself when you've made successes (not food treats if you're dieting!). A spa, manicure, new outfit etc I'm sure you can think of plenty of treats! Now what date are you going to set for that treat when you've made an achievement towards your resolution?

Tip 4. Ensure your resolution is for "You". It has to be something you really want to do for yourself. Also make sure resolutions aren't about trying to change someone else (only they can change themselves!)

Tip 5. Phrase your resolution positively. For example rather than saying I want to lose weight, say I want to weigh *......* (fill in the blank!) Focus on how much you want to lose (remember the tip about being specific). And don't forget the tip about the deadline so put a date in there too! By phrasing positively, you will help your subconscious mind help you to achieve this - as you are saying exactly what you want. If I say 'Don't think of a pink flying elephant', your mind will probably still imagine it, it can't differentiate. This is often why telling toddlers not to do something, results in the opposite! Say what you want rather than what you don't want!

Tip 6. Whilst we're talking about ways to phrase your Resolutions, make it 'Present' too. This really opens up your mind to your possibilities, as it acts as if you already have it. This is why affirmations are great. The more you say something, the more you start to believe it. That's how we get beliefs in the first place. To make it present, say things like, I have, I am etc. If it still feels really strange, put a date in front of it ie By (date), I weigh ........ (insert weight!) or By (date), I am a non-smoker - Whoah - how does that feel? Scary? Exciting? It's a great step forward. Keep saying it daily!

Tip 7. Make sure your resolutions fit in with your values in life. Think about what's important to you in life and see if your resolution fits in with them. For example if your resolution is 'boring', but 'fun' is a high priority for you, it is unlikely that you will be able to achieve it without making your resolution more fun. Values are words like adventure, family, fun, honesty etc. I have a big list of value words to help you tick and cross out the ones applicable to you. Please let me know if you'd like it. You can have it for free!

Tip 8. Make your resolution measurable.  This helps you see your achievement.  Ask yourself 'How will I know I've achieved this?' It could be that your clothes feel looser or the scales or tape measure show results or it could even be a chart to record the actions you have taken.

Well that's it for my tips at the moment. I could go on forever but I don't want the article to go on too long!

If you'd like more tips, please feel free to follow me on:

https://www.facebook.com/ICanLifeCoaching

@iCanLifeCoachin

Nicolina Zarola



Visit my website at:  www.icanlifecoaching.co.uk

Telephone: (01993) 824993